At first, it was just a 4 bar loop, then 8, and then eventually turned into this long melodic phrase.

But I wasn’t able to piece it all together until Thanksgiving of 2022, which feels fitting. The holidays have always felt bittersweet to me being distant (physically and emotionally) from my own family, and it was that emotional thread that helped me weave the phrases into something whole.

I revisit this tune on the piano when I feel overwhelmed. It’s a melody born out of exhaustion, and out of this strange human tension of experiencing the deepest joy while feeling incredibly empty.

In writing this now, I guess what started as a melody for her became something I needed too.

This doesn’t count toward my 30-minute album goal. Just another feeler for the week.

And here is an intro if you are new here:

Hi, my name is Justin. I’m a musician living in Phoenix, AZ. Throughout 2025, I’m challenging myself to create a 30-minute album, one song at a time. Each song will be shared as a live performance video and paired with an original poem. It’s a work in progress, unfolding piece by piece and I’ll be posting a new segment every few weeks. This is a pop-up newsletter and will only run through the end of the year. If you’d like to follow along as the album takes shape, subscribe.

Where I am at so far:

• Newsletter 1: Minutes 1-4 of 30

On the way there today, I thought, “hey, I should share this.”

Here’s a 30-second voice memo of that hum, “duh duh duh”, over a couple of my favorite chords.

I love writing with these chords, and depending on how long I’ve been sedated at a screen, I just like pounding them out over and over again.

It’s like my body just needs to feel the piano humming back at me to feel something.

And I wanted to hear it humming across the octaves.

I never feel that from a screen.

This doesn’t count toward my 30-minute album goal. Just a little feeler for the week.

I’ll do the intro at the end today…

Hi, my name is Justin. I’m a musician living in Phoenix, AZ. Throughout 2025, I’m challenging myself to create a 30-minute album, one song at a time. Each song will be shared as a live performance video and paired with an original poem. It’s a work in progress, unfolding piece by piece and I’ll be posting a new segment every few weeks. This is a pop-up newsletter and will only run through the end of the year. If you’d like to follow along as the album takes shape, subscribe.

Where I am at so far:

• Newsletter 1: Minutes 1-4 of 30

Song - “La Magdalena”

I stared at this composition for months because nothing felt authentic enough to say “I love you, forever” and represent all the complicated feelings leading up to our wedding. So I wrote and rewrote with a guiding tether of ‘how hard can I push parts to test my technical capability as a piano player.”

"La Magdalena" become a composition that starts with a simple melody that says “I am just a wandering soul” and crescendos into the dramatic abyss that says “I want to feel every inch of your soul until the very end”. It was the only place my heart knew where to go with this.

Poem - “you”

On a starry night
an owl flew onto my shoulder
“Who are you?”

"Who am I?
but just a voice in my head
like tumbling stones without a tide."

So the owl lifted me up and flew me to the moon.
“Who are you?”

"Who am I?
But just a drifting man
Waiting on the shadow of a dream without light."

So the owl lifted me further and flew me to the sun,
“Who are you?”

"Who am I?
But just empty space
And a hardened heart without love."

And so the owl flew beyond the stars, farther than he had ever flown, beyond the edge of the known universe…

When I awoke, there you were, the magic markers of the stars, the glowing guide of the night, the tender warmth of the sun, and the beauty beyond overflowing with light and love.

“Who are you?” said the owl,

“I am whole.”

To everyone reading, thank you truly for your kind words and support.

If this is your first time here, subscribe below to follow my musical journey in 2025.

If you enjoyed this, feel free to share it with someone who might too.

Sincerely,

Justin